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| Top 10 Reasons My Faster-Than-Light Car Rules: |
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| 10) Stephen Hawking always wants to carpool. |
| 9) Breaking the laws of physics is only a misdemeanor in most states. |
| 8) Traffic enforcement is pretty much limited to cops with Ph.D.'s in Quantum Physics. |
| 7) Bugs - they never see you comin'. |
| 6) I can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen. |
| 5) I made a fortune selling pizza with the slogan "It's there before you order or it's free!" |
| 4) I sleep until noon and still get to work by 8:00am! |
| 3) I'm never in the car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song. |
| 2) My cigar butts don't land in the back seat, they land in last week! |
| ... and the number one cool thing about my faster-than-light car is ... |
| 1) I get a license plate that reads "ME = MC^2" |
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| What Cool Scientists Are Listening To - Click Links Below |
| :: Cash - Being Simple |
| :: Viva K - Does It Matter? |
| :: The Ark - One Of Us Is Gonna Die Young |
| :: The Donnas - Roll On Down The Highway |
| :: Billy Joe Shaver - Georgia On A Fast Train |
| :: Phish - Gin And Juice |
| :: The Whigs - Technology |
| :: Marit Larsen - Only A Fool |
| :: Euphoria - Back Against The Wall |
| :: Richard Swift - As I Go |
| :: Snowglobe - Rainbow |
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| Percentage of visitors who stay more than 20 minutes: 16% |
| Most hits by Country - USA, England, Japan |
| Queso Fresco Cheese References: 3 |
| Cocaine references: 7 |
| Queso Fresco Cheese References As Allegories for Cocaine: 2 |
| Jaime Pressly references: 5 |
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Making The World Safe For Science - One Supermodel At A Time
You Know I Have Arrived When I Can Outsource My Video Gaming
I confess I have a lot of video games. I have two gaming systems and a desktop PC with a 21" flatscreen monitor. But I'll be darned if I have time to play any of them. The most important reason is because I always have to be doing two things at once. I can't sit in front of an Xbox and play games because I couldn't watch a movie at the same time then. And most games that require the graphics of a desktop PC are filled with time-wasting activities and not much actual story.
I knew I wasn't the only one with this problem and that eventually someone would find a way for me to delegate the grunt-work of my video gaming to Asians.
The Asians know we are that lazy. So they have established whole factories where they do nothing but play video games in 12-hour shifts. Then they sell off the games, characters, gold pieces, prizes, whatever to overly wealthy yet inherently slothful gamers in other countries.
I haven't yet discovered a way to outsource phone calls to relatives, household chores and writing this blog to Asia but video games are a nice place to start. I feel more productive already.
posted by Buckaroo at 7:24 AM |
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