Making The World Safe For Science - One Supermodel At A Time
Parting The Red Sea - Science Explains That ( And The Rest Of The Bible Too )
James Cameron, who wanted us to suspend disbelief long enough to buy into robots from the future and aliens in our oceans, is worried people might actually have belief in something he didn't create through the magic of film; specifically that the Old Testament God ( not the 'be nice to each other' New Testament one ) was willing to whack some Egyptians when the Jews left there 3000 years ago. I don't know why that's so outrageous ... Mel Gibson was willing to whack some Jews last week and look what God did to him - yeah, that's right, Disney is now shopping his movie about Aztecs. Or Mayans. Or Incans. Whatever.
To back up his theory, Cameron invents a chain of events so bizarre and unlikely ... well, if you can believe the stuff Cameron theorizes, I should be able to convince you the friggin' Easter Bunny heaped 10 plagues on that Pharoah guy.
Now maybe there is truth to it and some volcanoes in Greece caused the water to part and magically un-part once the bad guys were stuck in the mud. Cameron has no insight as to why such a fortuitous coincidence happened at just the right moment and neither do I. All I can say about that is, when I was a kid and I got a birthday cake and I asked where it came from, my mother told me she made it. When I got older I discovered the cake was really made of flour and some water and an egg. This newfound knowledge of the composition of the cake did not invalidate the existence of my mother.
Maybe James Cameron will go back to making movies some day but I wouldn't hold my breath. Until then, get ready to go see Crank. Because it has Jason Statham, who is a legitimately good action hero? Of course not ... is the name of this site "Science And Legitimately Good Action Heroes?" No, it is "Science And Supermodels" and that means you should go see it because it has Amy Smart in her underwear.
She can't part the Red Sea but scientists definitely detect some movement when we look at her. Magically, Amy Smart just happens to be 30 this year. Her ability to make pie crusts is unknown at this time.
So anyway, back to the title of our post ... if James Cameron didn't part the Red Sea and God didn't do it, how does science explain it? Easy. My mother did it. Thanks mom.
posted by Buckaroo at 6:44 AM
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