Top 10 Reasons My Faster-Than-Light Car Rules:


10) Stephen Hawking always wants to carpool.
9) Breaking the laws of physics is only a misdemeanor in most states.
8) Traffic enforcement is pretty much limited to cops with Ph.D.'s in Quantum Physics.
7) Bugs - they never see you comin'.
6) I can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen.
5) I made a fortune selling pizza with the slogan "It's there before you order or it's free!"
4) I sleep until noon and still get to work by 8:00am!
3) I'm never in the car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song.
2) My cigar butts don't land in the back seat, they land in last week!
... and the number one cool thing about my faster-than-light car is ...
1) I get a license plate that reads "ME = MC^2"

What Cool Scientists Are Listening To - Click Links Below
:: Cash - Being Simple
:: Viva K - Does It Matter?
:: The Ark - One Of Us Is Gonna Die Young
:: The Donnas - Roll On Down The Highway
:: Billy Joe Shaver - Georgia On A Fast Train
:: Phish - Gin And Juice
:: The Whigs - Technology
:: Marit Larsen - Only A Fool
:: Euphoria - Back Against The Wall
:: Richard Swift - As I Go
:: Snowglobe - Rainbow

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Making The World Safe For Science - One Supermodel At A Time

Need To Learn Fractals? Get Cornrows!

There's some modern school of thought that says you have to be 'culturally relevant' to teach students, like students in New York City won't get it if you use a mathematical example that involves counting trees. So if you want your students to learn fractal geometry you have to use corn row hair braids to make your point. Take this, for example:

"Each braid is represented as multiple copies of a "Y" shaped plait. In each iteration, the plait is copied, and a transformation is applied. The series of transformed copies creates the braid."

Now, honestly, does any kid who can understand that sentence need to be talked down to and given culturally relevant examples about corn rows? I bet not.

But, hey, I don't mind occasionally taking the easy road so I have already ordered my motorized ice cream cone. Yes, I am that lazy. Months ago I even outsourced my video gaming to Asia. And pretty much my whole life.

But not the sex part of it - well, not completely. To get excited, I just watch this Japanese woman breast feed her cat. But don't tell the little woman. It can be our dirty secret.

posted by Buckaroo at 7:07 AM |

0 attempts to be as funny as a scientist

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